I want you to read what’s on my brain, just a snippet, read it out loud…

So I really want to try and make this rhyme,

What’s on my mind,

I wish I could rewind,

And go back behind,

Myself back in time,

And grab myself from behind,

Because I ignored all the signs,

I was so blind.

But it’s happened, where in the future, but I can hardly see my future, that fatal mistake is hanging over my head like a piano, threatening to make me face the music…

I don’t want that piano to fall,

It just might take it all,

The good, bad, big and small,

I took God’s number and gave it a call,

Line jammed, went on his Facebook and messaged his wall,

Felt like I was talking to a brick wall

But with a brick wall I can take my anger out on it, all the frustration and fever festering from the depths of my brain, will I ever be the same? I don’t want to change…

But I already am changing and not for the better,

I’m smiling and all my bright sides are getting darker,

I’m losing faith and my goals are looking further,

Away. Home isn’t where I want to be so it’s harder,

To be comfortable in a house with no father

Father, he left, took my childhood with him. Turned it into currency to spend on other women. I say it all the time, my daddy ran away, but how much better would things be if he was to stay…

If he was to pick me up after every school day,

Would I have been smart enough not to throw my life away?

If he was to teach me all the things I shouldn’t say,

Would my tongue be sharp to cut the bondage in my way?

If he just came and watched a bit of my school plays,

Would I have been able to act in different ways?

But he never stayed, and here I am today, with so much on my brain, and heavy price to pay, I might not get a discount, before this strife will dismount, from my shoulders because like a soldier I’m marching on through this battle, but I won’t let it beat me, will never let it eat me, the belly of the beast, can look from the west to the east, north to the south, but I will never touch its mouth, because I’ve seen too much pain but I’ve got so much more to gain…this is a little snippet of what’s on my brain.

by Abraham Popoola

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